1. Dreamweaver if you want a lot of options and a lot of stuff done for you and/or at your fingertips to use. If you want a faster and/or lighter piece of software, you could go with Geany (though I think that's only for Linux, not sure). Otherwise, there's always Notepad.
2. WinSCP is the simplest and smallest I know of. SmartFTP is nicer looking and probably has a few more features and security, etc.
3. Pages should be small and simple. You could also use CSS, PHP and maybe a little Javascript to make your pages clean, neat and attractive. And if you must have images, make them either small in dimension or low in quality (like 6 or under on the quality scale in Photoshop when saving a JPG).