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Water Water Everywhere...
(Click here to view the original thread with full colors/images)
Posted by: laborat
(something for you to consider while I email the addy for christiansforcannibus.com to my pastor)
Every now and then in Misssouri we actually get more than a day of spring before we free fall into the dog days of summer. As of late, the old familiar sayings aren't working well -- its Snowing in March, Windy in April, Rainy in May...(god knows what June will bring)
Rainy in May is not a good sign for St.Charles County.
We have the Missouri River as our North boundary, the Mississippi to the East, with various rivers (Quiver, Salt, and Merramac) currently out of their banks here and there. It is a time when the river rats tie their boats to the roof, put their few valuables in the truck, and evacuate the chickens and dogs. Sandbagging partys are more frequent than rent partys.
It is also the rare time of the year when First Clam Labo gets out of his shell and participates in EXtreme Sports.
(I might add that the faint of heart should quit reading now because I am going to describe the sport and why I like it so much.)
But before I do a little back story: As a teenager stumbling through my first case of major angst and estrangement, in a 50's America that thrived on Conformity, I stood upon a clifftop overlooking the Lake of the Ozarks in a RAging Thunderstorm and Dared.. actually dared God to strike me dead with lightning.
One doesnt really need a reason to dare whatever concept(or lack of) of their God or even talk to them, but in my case I believe it was having to buy government bonds for college instead of one of the new Fender guitars coming out from the money I was making working afterschool. One thing led to another and I in typical teenage logic, decided to appeal to a higher authority. Two inches of rain later, Lightning did strike a boat dock (and I still leave religious pamphlets in marinas whenever I can).
All this has led to a lifelong fascination with Storm based events -- Floods, Tornados, Mudslides, Corporate Bail Outs... It also led to the EXtreme sport I absolutely love to do...I like to call it White Water DRiving. What is White Water Driving? Im glad you asked.
It is when you are driving on an interstate highway under constant major repair between two huge Trucks hauling explosives and caterpillars in a MAJOR rainstorm that rains so hard no one can see the highway. Like i said this sport is so EXtreme that most people only play by accident or by being stupid. I do it because Im doing my research thesis on "Accidental Stupidity -- A Jungian interpretation of Stupid Accidents".
So there I was Tuesday night (extra points for night) in an old car with worn tires (extra points for worn tires), one headlight (extra points for one headlight), Wet Power Brakes (duh)...
some of you may recall my Mercury also pings and the wipers do wierd things and i give myself extra points for that,
...on interstate 70 trying to make the drive in Driving Rain (extra points for knowing whether its a group or a song) from Columbia to O'Fallon...now lest this become one of Miller's rants, let me say that most people when bad weather is coming in, (Snow, Rain, Hurricaines, Smog), usually drive ONLY to the grocery store for canned goods to last thru the event. I think that is why there are always Trucks on the interstates.
And trucks on the Interstates are messing with our Eisenhower Era Interstate Highway Infastructure. Pot holes and citys are as analgous as Congress and CAmpaign Finance. (probably why Pot is still illegal too)
On the way down to Columbia I was stuck (literally) in a 40 mile traffic jam as highway workers shoveled Sand into a Sink Hole that was developing in the highway. I thought for a while about abandoning my attempt at a new White Water Driving Record and going into the Hub cap business. they were everywhere some were still rolling.
Cars got to creep one at a time, between shovels of sand over the whole hole, a lottery for disaster actually that reminded me of some old Sci-Fi short story that made it to the B&W Twilight Zone. (cars stuck in the holland tunnel and they gassed the stranded to help control population.) Since this is Missouri everyone thought it was funny and some actually stopped to see who would lose. Rednecks DO have a sense of humor coarse as it is.
The rules for White Water Driving are simple. You have to make it from Point A to point B within a rolling thunderstorm super cell. Should there be Hail all contestants are disqualified. You score points for average miles per hour...plus miles traveled, divided by the amount in hundreths of a inch of the Rainfall for that day along the route. You do not have to finish the course to win, but it helps if you have a cell phone. I didnt but still managed to beat my times from the Flood of 93. If you made it this far, You might want to go back and reread the portions you are still wondering about. I am available for additional questions and rules for a fee.
Posted by: Shalome
Laborat, which section of I-70 has a sinkhole? I'm travelling the St.Louis-Columbia route soon and want to know what to expect..
Posted by: laborat
it was at that bridge between mineola hill the big one with the rest stops.. and the bachelor callwood exit...
Posted by: Gunslinger
I've done the playing-with-large-vehicles-in-the-rain game on 270 before.
Wasn't a good plan.
Posted by: Shalome
Ugh. Where does Missouri's infrastructure budget GO?!? That's a really freakin' dangerous place for a sinkhole to appear.
If only they hadn't cut costs when building the interstate originally -- I-70 through MO is built on SAND. That's right, they used sand from the glorious rivers to grade the ground for paving.
Posted by: redwench
actually, sand is recommended as a base for paving, since it doesnt expand and contract with the water content. its actually quite stable. 
Posted by: justinious
 Quote:
Originally posted by Shalome
Ugh. Where does Missouri's infrastructure budget GO?!? .
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Missouri has a biiiiiiiiiig budget deficit. Apparently there's enough money to build a new stadium though.
Posted by: Darky!
Where does the money go?
To the politicians pockets, most of the state roads/highways in missouri are out of shape, and need repair work.
The freeway in KC is nice though.
Posted by: Qui Gon-Jinn
There is a Salt River in Missouri???
The Salt River runs through Mesa, Tempe, and Phoenix Arizona.. of course it is for the most part bone dry.. except in Temep where they put up 2 dam's 2 miles apart and pumped in water to make tempe town lake.. they even have a beach park.. but oyu can't swim in the lake.. or fish.. and Only Electric or wind or human driven vessels are allowed on the lake..
Posted by: Shalome
Salt river? No.. but there IS the Missouri river system and the Mississippi river valley..
Posted by: laborat
everyplace has a Salt River...
http://www.cares.missouri.edu/cwic/mowater/mowater2.html
Posted by: Jeddak
Lab, tell me if this qualifies (I have no cash so you will have to bill me for your fee).
Back in the early 70's I made weekly trips from Illinois to Kansas and back on the weekends (oh the things you do for love) which usually amounted to 6 1/2 hours of intense driving one way (had to get back to base or else) pushing my little blue pinto as fast as it could go with the pedal floored (about 75 mph). While I had many adventures and several close calls (including a 3 day trip during a snowstorm that dropped 19 inches of snow overnight catching me while heading home for Christmas) there was one time that involved large quantities of water, total blindness and the desperation of a 18 year old trying not to be late for roll call.
The trip had begun in the rain (had already kissed my girlfriend and future ex-wife goodnight several hours earlier) and it had continued to pour down as I traveled eastward on I 70 across Missouri. I should of slowed my pace when I came into the Saint Louis metro area but I didn't and continued my journey at max speed when the bridge across the mississippi loomed up at me out of the darkness through the sheets of rain (a bridge I dreaded even in good weather due to my problem with vertigo). The thunderstorm was dumping even more rain than I had experienced along the entire trip overwhelming my feeble wipers almost to the point where I could just barely see the road and the approaching line of semi trucks in the slow lane (all tucked in nice and close to each other and numbering over ten..not sure now but at the time I remember counting them). With no fore thought I plowed into the blinding storm of water coming off the trucks as I attempted to pass them just as I reached the first part of the bridge (that bridge always seemed to go on forever). Now I was totally blind with the only thing visible being view of the bridge rail out my left passenger window and the the wall of trucks on my right with my pinto still hurtling forward into the night. For a brief instant I considered my options ----------------and when I decided I had none I did the only thing available to me and continued blindly onward through the cascading water at 75 mph. After several moments blind terror (which seemed like several minutes) I made it across the river safe and sound and continued my journey to base (driving out of the rain shortly thereafter).
So I just wondered...any points for that?
ps..made it to roll call in time and made my friends very happy but not because I had survived my harrowing trip but more because of the several cases of Coors in my trunk that had survived the trip. Something about Coors not being legal in Illinois at that time..who knows...what did I know.
Posted by: Ion Silverbolt
This thread makes me have to go pee..hehe Someone needs to start a desert thread. 
Posted by: laborat
Jeddak... Aqua Pro Am dude... you might want to turn pro...get a lot of points for what you did...Remember we are trying to get White Water Driving into the next Olympics.
Posted by: Shalome
Well, Laborat, hope you're stocked up on sandbags this year.. they're talking about this year being a repeat (albeit a bit lighter) of 1993...
http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/ne...o%20'93%20flood
Posted by: Darky!
Quote:
Oh dear god.
No.
Please No.
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